The Popeโ€™s Exorcist โ€“ Film Review

Director: Julius Avery

Writers: Michael Petroni and Evan Spiliotopoulos

Starring: Russell Crowe, Daniel Zovatto, Alex Essoe, Franco Nero, Laurel Marsden, Peter DeSouza-Feighoney

Rating: โ˜…โ˜…

The Popeโ€™s Exorcist is a horror film from director Julius Avery, with a script from Michael Petroni and Evan Spiliotopoulos. Russell Crowe stars as Gabriele Amorth, the Popeโ€™s exorcist, who travels to a run-down abbey in Spain that is being renovated by an American family. While the work is being carried out a demon is released that possesses the youngest member of the family.

Russel Crowe does a good job as Amorth, the wise-cracking exorcist that is facing controversy within the Vatican as the church is trying to stay relevant. The rest of the characters arenโ€™t as convincing and just quite bland, which is a shame. The dialogue is pretty bad at points and it often feels like it’s all just going through the motions. Itโ€™s a possession film and we’ve all seen very similar stuff before, such as the equally formulaic Pray for the Devil that came out last year.

Effect-wise, the film is pretty decent, especially towards the end when everything really gets going. Sadly, while it looks good, none of it is scary. Besides a couple of jump-scares thereโ€™s nothing close to being tense or chilling. It doesnโ€™t even create a creepy atmosphere, despite its abandoned abbey setting, complete with hidden catacombs underneath it that reveal a secret conspiracy dating back centuries.

The film is being marketed as being based on the memoirs of Father Gabriele Amorth, and while itโ€™s definitely inspired by them, itโ€™s also definitely not a true story. Even if you take it at face value itโ€™s way too over the top to be believable, with a ridiculous Catholic conspiracy, extreme possession, and a battle with the king of Hell.

Itโ€™s a cookie-cutter possession film and doesnโ€™t really bring anything to the new table. Russell Crowe is good as the lead character and makes it watchable, but itโ€™s still just a by-the-numbers special effects driven horror film. If youโ€™ve seen pretty much any possession film then you know exactly what youโ€™re going to get.

Thanks for reading! If you liked my review, please subscribe to never miss a post:

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

The Super Mario Bros. Movie โ€“ Film Review

Directors: Aaron Horvath and Michael Jelenic

Writer: Matthew Fogel

Starring: Chris Pratt, Anya Taylor-Joy, Charlie Day, Jack Black, Keegan-Michael Key, Seth Rogen, Fred Armisen

Rating: โ˜…โ˜…โ˜…โ˜…

Thirty years after the often ridiculed (yet still has an incredibly devoted cult following) Super Mario Bros. film, a second adaptation of the long-running Nintendo series is here. This time around itโ€™s an animated film from Illumination, the animation studio behind the Despicable Me series. It’s already doing better than the live-action one. In itโ€™s first weekend the film has broken Frozen IIโ€™s record for biggest opening weekend for an animated film.

Mario and Luigi find a hidden tunnel in Brooklynโ€™s sewers and find a pipe that takes them to the Mushroom Kingdom. They get split up and Mario seeks the help of Princess Peach to help him find his brother, while Luigi is captured by Bowser who is heading to Princess Peachโ€™s castle to ask her to marry him. Itโ€™s pretty much exactly what youโ€™d expect from a Mario story, and it works. Itโ€™s a fun-filled adventure with plenty of laughs along the way.

With Illumination animating the film itโ€™s not surprising that itโ€™s visually stunning. The animation is bright and colourful, making the Mushroom Kingdom really come alive. The characters also look brilliant. There are even a few moments where the film turns into a side-scrolling platformer. Thereโ€™s been a lot of talk about the cast, mostly about Chris Pratt not being right for Mario, and while it is a little strange to hear Pratt and Charlie Day voice the beloved Italian brothers for the first few scenes, it quickly becomes natural, and they are both brilliant in the roles. The rest of the cast are also brilliant, especially Anya Taylor-Joy as Princess Peach and Jack Black as Bowser. Thereโ€™s a song that Bowser sings about his love of Peach, which is one of the funniest bits of the film.  

For people who have played the Mario games and are well versed in Nintendo history, then thereโ€™s plenty of references scattered throughout the film from well-known sound cues to an arcade machine that looks a lot like the original Donkey Kong game named Jump Man (in the original DK game, Mario is known as Jump Man). Theyโ€™re not distracting, and the film doesnโ€™t rely on referential humour, so it doesnโ€™t matter if youโ€™ve never played a Mario game.

The Super Mario Bros. Movie is a blast for all ages, from start to finish. Itโ€™s one of the best video game adaptations ever made, and with the way the box office is going it looks like thereโ€™s a lot more Nintendo films to come. With things like the recent Sonic films and Detective Pikachu, the rule that video game films are always bad has been truly broken once and for all.

Thanks for reading! If you liked my review, please subscribe to never miss a post:

Posted in film reviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre โ€“ Film Review

Director: Guy Ritchie

Writers: Ivan Atkinson, Marn Davies, and Guy Ritchie

Starring: Jason Statham, Aubrey Plaza, Josh Hartnett, Cary Elwes, Bugzy Malone, and Hugh Grant

Rating: โ˜…โ˜…โ˜…ยฝ

Operation Fortune is pretty much exactly what youโ€™d expect from a Guy Ritchie spy comedy thatโ€™s led by Jason Statham. From the opening scene itโ€™s non-stop fun, with good action and plenty of jokes. It hits the ground running and doesnโ€™t let up for the almost two-hour run-time.

The opening sequence shows Nathan (Cary Elwes) being informed by the British Government that a device known as โ€˜The Handleโ€™ has been stolen and is tasked with forming a team to get it back. Throughout the exposition heavy opening are scenes of the device being stolen, as well as Nathan recruiting his team. It’s all blended together, keeping everything moving quickly. They donโ€™t even know what the device is, just that itโ€™s being sold by arms dealer Greg Simmonds (Hugh Grant). Their mission is to find out what the device is and who the buyer is.

There is no slow-down with the pacing at all and yet, it never feels like too much or exhausting. Thereโ€™s no wasted time throughout. It’s filled with action, that doesnโ€™t feel quite as explosive as other spy films, but is still exciting to watch. Itโ€™s everything youโ€™d want and expect from a spy film – car chases, shoot-outs, heists, and going undercover all in the name of saving the world.

Itโ€™s all made better with Hugh Grant clearly having a lot of fun playing another villain. Heโ€™s essentially playing the same character as he did in Ritchieโ€™s The Gentleman, with the same voice and slimy personality. Hugh Grant is just great at playing the bad guy, from Paddington 2 to the recent Dungeons and Dragons, the roles suit him perfectly. Jason Statham is also oozing charm, as he usually does. Heโ€™s consistently entertaining in everything heโ€™s in, and this isnโ€™t an exception. Aubrey Plaza is brilliant and convincing as an international spy. This would make a good double bill with Plazaโ€™s other recent film, Emily the Criminal.

The plot is completely predictable, as the spy-group travel from place to place to find the device, never having trouble finding clues of where to go next. Thereโ€™s a twist late in the story, but itโ€™s really obvious that itโ€™s going to happen quite early-on. None of that detracts too much from the film, as itโ€™s still entertaining. The characters and jokes more than make up for the standard plot.

Thanks for reading! If you liked my review, please subscribe to never miss a post:

Posted in film reviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Air โ€“ Film Review

Director: Ben Affleck

Writer: Alex Convery

Starring: Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, Jason Bateman, Marlon Wayans, Chris Messina, Chris Tucker, and Viola Davis

Rating: โ˜…โ˜…โ˜…โ˜…

Air, which is written by Alex Convery and directed by Ben Affleck, is the story of how Nike managed to make a deal with rookie Michael Jordan to create the Air Jordan shoe. The film stars Matt Damon as Sonny Vaccaro as he tries to convince his boss, CEO Phil Knight (Ben Affleck), to take a gamble and place all of the basketball divisionโ€™s budget on securing a deal with Jordan.

The film starts with a montage of shots from the 80s, setting the scene with clips from the era accompanied by Dire Straitโ€™s Money for Nothing, before we meet Sonny as he travels between college basketball matches to find new athletes to sponsor. When heโ€™s not seeking new players, heโ€™s betting big in Vegas. Nike is presented as a bit of an underdog in the story, with Converse and Adidas having bigger basketball divisions. Itโ€™s not a secret that Jordan ended up signing up with Nike, so thereโ€™s not much tension throughout the film about whatโ€™s going to happen.

It’s a feel-good underdog story, which is a strange thing considering even at that point Nike was a massive company, but it works. Itโ€™s a compelling story, due to how good the cast is. The star filled cast are fantastic, with excellent performances from everyone. Jordanโ€™s mother, who is played brilliantly by Viola Davis, who was cast at Jordanโ€™s suggestion. Sheโ€™s on top form in every scene, even though sheโ€™s not in the film that much. While Ben Affleck was given Michael Jordanโ€™s blessing to make the film, you never see his face and he doesnโ€™t really speak throughout the story, emphasising that this is a story about the shoe, not a biopic of Jordan himself.

A story about the creation of a shoe doesnโ€™t sound interesting at first, but Air manages to make it so. Itโ€™s simply excellent storytelling, so even if you have no interest in Michael Jordan, basketball, or even shoes, itโ€™s still worth watching. ย 

Thanks for reading! If you liked my review, please subscribe to never miss a post:

Posted in film reviews | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Magic in London: Enrolment โ€“ Part 16

Catch up on Magic in London here: https://ashleymanning.com/magic-in-london/


Fiona and Chuck moved through the rest of the school as quickly as they could, freeing classrooms from skeleton teachers as they did. Most of the rooms were empty, but every so often they would find a classroom filled with students in a trance as the skeleton wrote increasingly violent and weird things over and over.

โ€œAre these real?โ€ Chuck asked after Fiona smashed a skull into a countless number of pieces.

โ€œKind of. The kid made them. They would be able to hurt you if they attacked, but they werenโ€™t real people, so you donโ€™t need to worry about that.โ€

โ€œOh, I hadnโ€™t even thought about that. Good to know.โ€

They got into a routine quickly. Fiona would go in, scatter the bones and Chuck would follow to grab the skull so Fiona could shatter it.

โ€œDo any of you know where Tommy is?โ€ she asked some of the children, and every time they replied with stunned silence.

โ€œWhere are the actual teachers?โ€ Chuck asked as they walked through the school.

โ€œThatโ€™s a good question and Iโ€™m sure weโ€™ll find the answer soon enough.โ€

They moved up to the top floor of the school, taking the stairs two at a time. With how easy the skeletons had been to take down, they were feeling confident that the rest would be easy enough. At the top of the stairs was a door without a window labelled โ€˜staff roomโ€™. Fiona moved straight passed it, heading to the next row of classrooms. Chuck stopped in front of the door.

โ€œFiona?โ€ he said quietly. โ€œI think we should check I here.โ€

She stopped, turned around and came back to the door just as Chuck was opening it. Inside was a mess of blood, guts, and body limbs.

โ€œWhat is this?โ€ Chuck said, his whole body turning to jelly and any confidence heโ€™d gained with fighting the skeletons drained quicker than the blood did from his face.

โ€œItโ€™s a massacre,โ€ Fiona said.

She stepped into the room, blood squelching under her feet as she did.

โ€œThis is real,โ€ she continued. โ€œThis isnโ€™t an illusion. You can smell it. That kid killed all of these teachers.โ€

โ€œAnd weโ€™re here to bring him back to Whistling?โ€

โ€œJust because he did it, doesnโ€™t mean he meant to or that he even understands whatโ€™s happened.โ€

โ€œStill, I donโ€™t think itโ€™s safe to have him around.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s not your decision, just as it isnโ€™t mine. And anyway, we canโ€™t exactly leave him here. Letโ€™s just carry on, we must be close.โ€

Chuck closed the door and followed Fiona down the hall. They were back to a slow walk, whispering, and not wanting to be found.

โ€œWhat happens to them now?โ€ Chuck asked as quietly as possible.

โ€œWhat do you mean?โ€

โ€œThe teachers. You said that thereโ€™s a kind of spell over everyone here and they wonโ€™t remember this later. What about the teachers, if theyโ€™re really dead. What happens to them?โ€

โ€œNothing. Arthur will make sure that they get buried and everyone moves on and no one will exactly know what happened. Heโ€™ll place a mental block in everyoneโ€™s heads, so they donโ€™t put two and two together and never question why so many died at one time. In a few days new teachers will be brought in, and everything will continue. Theyโ€™ll just feel an urge to up and quit their existing jobs and move here. For the next couple of months everything will be hazy and then itโ€™ll all be clear again.โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s way too detailed of an answer.โ€

โ€œItโ€™s not the first time something like this has happened. You know Toby, right? His friend destroyed a church in his hometown and not a single person remembers it was even there. Arthur scrubbed it from history.โ€

โ€œHeโ€™s that powerful?โ€

โ€œYes. Heโ€™s incredibly powerful, but he wouldnโ€™t be able to do it if it was something significant. If this was like Oxford or if it was Big Ben that got destroyed, then he wouldnโ€™t be able to cloud everyoneโ€™s memories. There would be too many people who know about it and too many recorded documents showing it.โ€

โ€œScary.โ€

โ€œWhat do you mean?โ€

โ€œItโ€™s scary to think that everything in life can be manipulated to that extent. That I could have a different job tomorrow purely because some wizard, sorry whistler, makes it that way. Thatโ€™s scary too me. Talk about no free will.โ€

โ€œHe doesnโ€™t do it often, and only if thereโ€™s no other choices.โ€

โ€œIโ€™m sure thatโ€™s the case, but itโ€™s still not a nice thought. All those people back there are dead, and no one will care enough to remember why.โ€

โ€œSuch is life. Most people arenโ€™t remembered for very long after they die and none of us will be remembered in a million years. Being remembered doesnโ€™t mean anything.โ€

โ€œNice pep-talk.โ€

โ€œI do try.โ€

โ€œI donโ€™t think you do,โ€ Chuck said with a half-smile.

They carried on walking down the corridor and didnโ€™t find another classroom filled with students. Most of the rooms were just empty cupboards filled with supplies. At the end of the corridor, hidden around a corner and with a sofa outside next to a table with a bunch of wilted flowers on it, was the headteacherโ€™s room.

โ€œThis has to be where he is, right?โ€ Chuck said.

โ€œIโ€™d guess so. Weโ€™ve checked almost everywhere else. You stay behind me, and only do something if I tell you to. He might come peacefully if we just speak to him.โ€

Fiona opened the door wide and stepped inside, leaving Chuck in the doorway. Sitting at the desk was a small child, couldnโ€™t have been more than eleven years old Chuck guessed. His eyes were closed, and he was sitting up straight, as if in meditation. If he knew that Fiona was getting closer, he made no signs of it.

โ€œTommy?โ€ Fiona asked as she reached the desk. โ€œAre you okay?โ€

The boy didnโ€™t move, he was just as still as heโ€™d been when they first entered the room. Fiona didnโ€™t move for a few seconds. Her grip was tight around the knife. Chuck could see that Tommy was breathing, but he didnโ€™t seem to be conscious. In that moment he forgot about the death in the room down the hall, the well, the students being captured. There was a peaceful feeling in the air, which was quickly destroyed by the horse skeleton bursting through the window to the side, shattering glass around the room. It neighed, itโ€™s mane ablaze in fire, and looked towards Chuck and Fiona with anger in its hollowed eyes.  

To Be Continuedโ€ฆ

Part Seventeen is available here: https://ashleymanning.com/2023/04/14/magic-in-london-enrolment-part-17/ ! Donโ€™t forget to subscribe to never miss a post:

Posted in Short Stories | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment